scared scared scared

Friends have made the decision to embark on the adventure of a significant move.

They, like us, have 2 kids under the age of 7.

And my friend asked if I had any insight for her about how to tell the kids.

I put together a whole list of recommendations, using the hats of both therapist and friend.

My oldest son was sitting nearby playing a video game as I set about to respond.

I thought it would be fun to check with him - 

to see what insight he might have.

{after all, we are close family friends and he is only one week younger than their oldest}

This is what he said:

You know, I think I would feel scared scared scared and when I feel scared scared scared, I like it when you let me feel that way and...help me remember that when I feel that way it always turns out okay - and most of the time it's actually really fun!  [pauses here to shoot a "bad guy"] Also, I would want to go to a restaurant for lunch when you tell me. And I think it would be good if I got to pick out some of my favorite toys to take in the car to move with me so I could play with them the whole way there...

{And then he went back to his video game}

His words have kind of stuck with me all week and I think, 

beyond the ease with which he responded, 

the thing about his response that is most striking to me is

his ability to put himself in his friend's shoes {empathy} and offer an articulate recommendation for managing the feelings that would come with such a scenario.

Even at his age, when faced with stress or change, his response highlights the desire to have someone:

Listen

Validate

Normalize

Distract

Definitely strategies to live by